Living in a foreign country displaces you, forces you to find and create for yourself a brand new home, somewhere else. For some, it is a thrilling new adventure while for others, it can be their greatest fear. No matter how accustomed you become to your new country (or state, or town, etc.), there’s always a slice of the other “homes” you have had that you will miss. Nostalgia strikes when you least expect it: a food, a song, a person. The smallest trial can overwhelm you with homesickness to the point where you’d give anything to go to that place, even if it were just for an instant.
But what does “home” even mean?
One of the first things people ask me working in tourism is “where are you from?” To most people, the answer should seem fairly simple: my hometown. However, because California is not my original hometown, but I feel more connected with it, I usually end up telling people “I was born in Colorado, but grew up in California.” Because I did. I truly feel like I became the person I am today because of my move to California.
That doesn’t mean that I don’t consider Colorado home as well. My entire family lives there, so it would be false to say otherwise. Each time I go back to Colorado, I get excited to return to see everyone, nostalgia tugging at my heart strings each time the roar of the engine plane starts up. I only visit about once a year, so it is a very special time for me. Plus, it gives me an opportunity to be a tourist in my own city!
However, living abroad now and having had to throw myself head first into having to adapt, learn, and appreciate a whole new culture has changed me and my perspective on the world. There is so much out there to see and experience. Traveling can provide the same feelings, but traveling and living, settling down somewhere, are two different things. When traveling, you know you’re returning home at some point, where you’re presently at is temporary, a journey toward a goal.
I have especially found since moving to Argentina that when home is no longer home, strangers become family. Intense bonds of unity are formed with those you are around (no matter how long you have known them). You find new ways of being you and expressing yourself. You will learn new things about yourself in the context of your new home. You will feel comfortable enough with yourself to let your weaknesses show. This is something very hard to describe to people. I have people in Colorado, California, Hawaii, Argentina, etc. that I consider “family” because of the experiences and bonds I have created with them for this exact reason.
I have a wandering spirit and a gypsy soul. Just because I have the desire to go somewhere else does not mean that I want to get away from something else or am escaping. Looking back, I know that following my gut and squeezing my life into a backpack and leaving California has been the best decision I have made so far. When you turn your life into a journey filled with uncertainty, you grow up in unexpected ways. You face new challenges, you get to know parts of you you didn’t know existed, you’re amazed at yourself, you broaden your horizons, you unlearn and start growing in humility, you feel homesick… and suddenly, you’re free.
“Never make your home in a place. Make a home for yourself inside your own head. You’ll find what you need to furnish it – memory, friends you can trust, love of learning, and other such things. That way it will go with you wherever you journey.”
-Tad Williams
A Guest Blog by Kaylee Boyle, originally posted here.